A Roller Coaster Year

Here we are into the end of the roller coaster year – December 2018!

This year was about embracing new blessings and titles, getting out of the comfort zone, exploring the extent of being patient and thresholds of pain, hitting the bottom rocks and never losing heart, giving into the negative energies and coming out of it with new positivism. 

Year in:
Five words: We have given our best!

The pregnancy times, when I was also working, taking long and bumpy rides to and from office every day, getting stuck into worst traffic jams due to metro construction, visiting doctor on the weekends, Wajahat had been giving constant reminders to me for medicines and getting excited to see our baby during ultrasound sessions, Mom regularly made fresh juices and minced meat and forced me to have it, dad kept praying all along, our families were taking care of us at their best during the process and after we made it to the finish line i.e. baby’s birth.

We were all excited to have our baby around. And already in love with our new little joy!

Four Words: It was not easy!
The last months, sleepless sweaty nights of June and July, the never-ending night of Labor, until I was cut and stitched back, struggled to sit, stand and walk again, and I could not hold my baby (for which I had waited for so long) until his third day with us; the day when mom and dad also left for performing hajj and I still had my stitches. 

But really, don’t be heartless and don’t say,

“You are not the first one who is going through it.” or “C-section is so common these days, most of the mothers have it.”

No, you are wrong! And you need to stop generalizing it. And all those who really have gone through this does not say that; they remember their times and say,

“I know, its hard but you will be fine.” or “It will take a few weeks but try to walk more often.”

Be nice! And if you do not know what to say just listen and give her the space she needs. Let her rest more! She is exhausted more than you know it. There is a difference between inquiring about her health or having your gossips around her and making her more restless.

Three Words: We became parents!
If anything can compensate the hardest times, that is the feeling of becoming parents. And if anything, no-one can compensate is parents love and care which I did not know of until I became one.
I had to walk through the night holding him tight while I suffered from pain and sleep deprivation. But they said walking heals the wound faster so I did not mind it but sleep was something which I could not control until I had to wake Wajahat up to take care of him so that I could sleep for an hour or so.
Nothing can wake up Wajahat except when our baby cries. He never let our baby cry. And that is the power of a child and that is the love of a father. He sits right away, hold him and soothe him.

As a side note, can we have paternal leaves in this country? I understand that we have a culture of relying on our families, where mom-to-be is sent to her mother’s house for better care or for avoiding the nuisance of taking care of an expecting mother. but honestly, that is the best period of bonding between the partners and their new-born.

And that was the window both of us decided to utilize and enjoy the eccentricities of becoming first time parents.

Two Words: Thank You!

We would not have made it to the end of the year as a “Happy Family”, if God has not been with us.

A child is certainly a miracle and whenever I see him, my faith in God gets stronger.

I could not thank enough to Him! And of course, a big thank you to Wajahat, my family, my in-laws, friends-like-family for all the support at all times; for giving us their best in our difficult times.

One Word: Shazil!
There comes a moment of embracing motherhood; mine came right at the time when doctor was trying to get hold of the baby but he kept slipping from her hands. I could sense the nervousness in her voice when she asked for another blade. No one responded to her. I felt as if everyone in the operation theater were distressed on the sight of the doctor struggling hard to bring out a precious life, or for a moment they thought they would lose any of us. The silence in the room was getting scary, I could only hear my heart beating faster with every passing second.
A few seconds later, the doctor shouted again for the blade. This time one of the assistants said, “Here!”
While, I closed my eyes and prayed,
‘Ya Allah! Isko bacha lain, meri khair hai,’
And in that moment, I embraced motherhood. 
Perhaps God wanted me to pray for his life. Perhaps He wanted to give me the flavor of selfless love! I preferred his life over mine; and that is the love of a mother.

So, here we are, pleased to announce the birth of
our little bundle of joy, 
our baby boy – Shazil Wajahat,
on July 30th, 2018.
We feel so much blessed to have him.  
Remember us in your prayers.